Impossible! So WeirdHP Crossover
by TheEverBurning
Summary: Okay, so we've all read a book at some time in our lives. Most of us have probably read more fantasy than anything else. But what if the characters from our favorite fantasy books, suddenly came to life? *I move next door to Harry! Midnight adventures!*
1. The Beginning

**Summary (in style of the beginning little hints from So Weird): **

Okay, so we've all read a book at some time in our lives. Most of us have probably read more fantasy than anything else. But what if the characters from our favorite fantasy books, suddenly came to life?

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Fiona Phillips was sitting on her bunk in the Molly Phillips tour bus. She was reading the latest in her favorite book series, Harry Potter. Harry Potter & the Order of the Phoenix had just been released, and she was just reading the opening pages when she noticed it. The moment she opened the book, she felt like something strange was going to happen, because a wind blew on her face, but all the windows on the bus were closed. She shivered nervously. She went on reading anyway.

It was dark on the street outside number 4 Privet Drive. A boy was sitting at his desk, writing a letter. This was no normal boy. This was Harry Potter. He had awoken in the middle of the night, covered in cold sweat. It had been another nightmare that had woken him. He had been having them frequently all summer. Most of them were about the night of the Third Task. And Harry had an unfortunate feeling that this wasn't just a nightmare. Harry, a 15 year old boy, was a wizard. He was not even normal by wizarding standards. He was the only known survivor of the Killing Curse, Aveda Kedavra. Unfortunately, Cedric Diggory had not been so lucky. He had been killed the previous year by Lord Voldemort. The sight of Cedric's dead body was still firmly imprinted in Harry's mind.

Fiona shivered. That had been one scary scene. It was her least favorite scene, but she had found it strangely exciting. "Fi!!!!!!!" Her mother was calling her. "Fi, we're going to get dinner now!" Fiona closed the book, after bookmarking her page. Little did she know that the fantasy she was reading would soon become reality.

~~*~~

_"He has escaped again!!! Wormtail, what is the meaning of this?" said a man in the corner of a dark, cold room._

_"My Lord, he is under the protection of the spell placed on that house by Dumbledore. It is almost impossible for us to reach him there!" said a scared little man from the floor._

_"Wormtail, the spell will only last until the start of term! Is there no way to reach him?!"_

_"M-my Lord! I am pleased to inform you that we have found a loophole! We cannot reach him there, but a muggle girl, who is not completely muggle, can! We have found that there is a witch who has not been following the Muggle Protection laws in the slightest. She has been writing books about us, and…"_

_"Wormtail, I believe what you're saying may have some use to me. Go on." The voice sounded amused now._

_"Yes, well, these books have been deported all around the world. But there is one girl whose father was a wizard, her mother, a muggle, and she was overlooked at the wizarding school in her country. Her mother never knew that her daughter was a witch. The girl, Fiona is her name, has been reading these books. She could do magic, if **someone** were to teach her how."_

_"Ah, yes, very interesting. But how would we convince her? And once we did, who would teach her?"_

_"I'm getting to that my Lord. The girl has a knack for attracting magical and unnatural things and situations. She thinks that her father is dead, but he is not! He is alive, and undecided in our war against Dumbledore. If we offer him a way to see his daughter again, I am sure he will be more than willing to side with us, and he is very powerful. He would teach her."_

The dream faded as another one replaced it.

_A girl of about 15 was sitting on a bed inside a bus, reading a book titled Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Harry noticed that there was an unearthly breeze every time she turned a page. She shuddered and mumbled, "I don't want to think about that right now," once. "Fi!!!!!!!!!!" came a voice from outside the window. "Fi, we're going to get dinner now!" The girl closed her book and jumped down from the bed._

Harry Potter woke up with a start. He was lying in his bed at the Dursleys. He tried to remember what had awoken him. Something in his dream. There was Voldemort and Wormtail. They were talking about a girl. Fiona they called her. A half-muggle, half-witch. They were going to use her to hurt someone! Then he remembered another dream, directly following that one. A girl had been reading a book with _his_ name on it! This was not unusual, but the book was a _muggle_ book! A woman had called her Fi. Harry put two and two together. "Oh. My. God." This girl was the Fiona that the two dark wizards had been talking about! Harry jumped off his own bed and quickly began scribbling away a letter to his godfather, Sirius Black. He would then make a copy of it for Dumbledore, the headmaster of Hogwarts.


	2. Malfoy Meetings

~Malfoy Coincidences~  
  
Fiona sat down in the booth at the local restaurant, where she and her family would be eating dinner that night. The restaurant was called "Castle Diner." It had a very strange catch phrase. "Food so good, it's magic!" It also had no parking lot, so they had had to park the bus a block away. She noticed a man sitting in the corner of the diner, wearing what looked like a cloak. She shrugged it off, thinking nothing of it. She didn't see the stick-like piece of wood the man had under his cloak. Jack, Fiona's brother, took a seat next to her. "Lotsa strange people here, huh?" he asked. "We've met stranger." Just then, another cloaked man came into the diner. He walked over to the other man, and they started whispering to each other. "Those two are the weirdest," he said. What Fiona thought was strange, was that there were no waiters or waitresses, and yet, everyone had food and menus. "Where are the waiters?" asked her mother. "I think this is a serve yourself place," commented Jack. That's when Fiona saw it. One of the cloaked men, the one that came in after them, pulled out a bit of wood and pointed it at the other man. Fiona stared at the man, utterly confused. "Hey, look what they're doing!" she whispered to Jack. He turned around to look at the two men. "So, they're psychos. Big deal." Just then, a little girl, dressed in the same type of clothing as the two men, came up to them. "'Scuse me, but me'n my mum and da were wondering why you're dressed up like Muggles," she asked. Then the little girl saw the two men over Fiona's shoulder, and her eyes widened. "Um." she said, starting to slowly back away, "Actually, I think I should probably go now." The girl pivoted on one heel and ran back to her parents. "Mum, Da!" Fiona heard her say, "I think there's some Death-Eaters in here! Look!" she said pointing towards the two men. Now Fiona heard one of the men speaking. This one was slightly taller than the other, and he was still pointing the bit of wood squarely at the man's chest. "If you don't do as my Lord tells you to, you know the punishments," he growled. "Yes, Lucius, but our Master did not even stop to think that Wormtail's information might be faulty," replied the second man calmly. "You idiot! We've all checked it. He's totally correct. for once." "You only checked the Muggle facts. She may still be a Muggle, and you wouldn't know it." "We never should have trusted you Americans. All that nonsense about freedom and equality." Fiona was gaping at the two men when the shorter one noticed her. He silently tapped the other man, Lucius, on the shoulder, and nodded at her, just as she closed her mouth and turned back to her family.  
  
Lucius Malfoy looked up to see a brunette of about 14 staring at himself and the other Death Eater with him, Kyle Bryant, her mouth agape. He lowered his wand and smirked beneath his hood. My, my, what is this? A Muggle, at the Castle Diner? The American Ministry has become careless. Well, I might as well have some fun while I'm here. He walked over to where the girl and her family was sitting, and said to her, "You know, you looked like a fish a moment ago." The girl glared at him. A woman who appeared to be the girl's mother put a hand on her shoulder. "Fi, ignore him, he'll go away," she said. She must be a Muggle, too. Otherwise, she'd know that she ought to run. The girl seems to be a bit smarter. Hey, wait! Did she say Fi? Isn't that what my Master said the girl, Fiona, liked to be called? Why, this could be her, and I might not even know it! "Mom, can we please eat somewhere else tonight?" the girl asked. "Fi, we were lucky to find this place in the middle of nowhere. There won't be another restaurant until we get into the city," said an older boy, who appeared to be her brother. "I'll live," was her reply. Ah, a smart girl here. She knows when to get as far away as possible. She immediately stood up, and walked calmly out the door. "Well, there goes the only chance we had of eating tonight," said the boy, "I wish she weren't always so suspicious of people. We might actually get a meal in the morning if nothing 'strange' happens." "On the contrary," replied Lucius, "Being suspicious of everyone and everything can be a good thing. Like my 'pal' over there," he said, jerking his thumb in Bryant's direction. "He nearly killed my wife the other day. I think he meant to do it, too." Lucius grinned to himself. Not that I would have minded. He then left the diner, not waiting for the Bryant to follow him, and apparated to the nearest Death Eater headquarters.  
  
Fiona climbed back onto the bus, and waited for the two men to leave. She couldn't help felling that she knew the man who had spoken to her from somewhere. His face was very familiar.  
  
***  
  
Harry sat down at his desk to write the letters, when he heard a car door slam in the next-door neighbors driveway. Looking out the window, he saw a blood red minivan, and a moving truck not far behind it. That's right. The neighbors have had that for sale sign up for weeks. I guess they found a buyer. He put down his quill, and got up to get a better look at the new neighbors. A man had already exited the car, and had started emptying the trunk. He was dressed in a pair of jeans, and a t-shirt that had some saying on it, but Harry couldn't make it out from this distance. Another door opened, and a woman, wearing a turtleneck sleeveless shirt and denim shorts, got out and started helping unload the car. Again, one of the back doors opened, and a boy, who looked to be about ten, climbed out of the car. He was wearing a baseball cap, (Americans. Figures, doesn't it? he thought.) cargo shorts, and a t-shirt. Lastly, a girl, who looked to be of about 14, came out of the car, and started carrying the boxes inside. She was wearing a black t-shirt with a glowing logo, and leather pants. She also had blue streaks in her hair, which glowed under the lantern light from the street lamps. As the girl walked back out of the house, her head snapped up to look at him. She glared at him, and then returned to her parents. That head snap must have hurt. Wait, only hurt?! Her neck should have been broken!!! This fact scared him only slightly, so he ignored it.  
  
The next morning, Harry got up early to do all the work the Dursleys had given him the night before. They would be away for a few days, and he was left to watch the house. Sighing, he pulled out the lawnmower. Well, might as well look on the bright side. I have four Dursley-free days coming up, and I might as well make the most of them. He took the lawnmower out to the backyard, where the hedges were, and started it up. Halfway through mowing the yard, he was given a shock as a thunderous sound came from the new neighbors' front yard. Cautiously he edged closer to the fence that separated the Dursleys' property from the neighbors'. He was slowly able to make out words among the roaring sound. ".as a kid wasn't scared cause no one knew me by name. Trashed my own house party cause nobody came." Harry covered his ears, but he could still hear it. This is what Americans consider music?! I don't want to know what they consider a good book, or even a good movie! He peeked over the fence, and saw the girl who had glared at him sitting and writing something, her eyes glittering as she wrote. How can she concentrate with her music so loud?! He tried calling out to her, but she, of course, couldn't hear him. Or so he thought. As he called out to her, her head snapped up with that lightning speed of the night before. She can hear me over this? I can't even hear myself think!!! She lowered the volume of her music, and walked over to her side of the fence. "Yes?" she said in a voice that clearly stated that she wanted to be left alone. Harry, somewhat taken aback, replied, "I, er, was wondering if you could turn that down a bit." "I did, didn't I? I mean, it was pretty loud, but I could hear you, which means it can't have been too loud." "Not too loud?! Bloody hell! You must be. volume deaf, or something!!! I couldn't hear myself think!" "No, my hearing is better than anyone I know. Maybe it's just because I'm used to it." "Yeah, maybe. Well, since I'm talking to you, I might as well introduce myself. So, let's start at the beginning. Hi, my name's Harry. What's yours?" The girl laughed. "Hi, Harry, my name's Gypsy. Pleased to make your acquaintance." "So," he said, "You're the new neighbors? Welcome to the neighborhood. Although, you won't be seeing me much, I go to a boarding school." Gypsy seemed interested in this. "Really? What's it called?" Harry shook his head. "I was forbidden to speak its name by my uncle, who I live with, so let's just call it The-School-That-Must-Not-Be-Named. Or, as my uncle tells everyone, I go to St. Brutus's School for the Incurably Criminal Boys. Bad lie, though, there's no such place." She nodded vigorously. "Of course there isn't, I've been asked to come to every criminal child institute in the world." Harry stared. "I'm just kidding!!!"  
  
Gypsy Malfoy had just moved to 6 Privet Drive in Surrey. She sat down to write a letter to her best friend back in America, Fiona Phillips, her Sum41 music blasting. Suddenly, she heard someone shout. Looking up, she saw a scrawny boy, with messy black hair and emerald green eyes behind black-rimmed glasses. He had his hands over his ears, and she could hear him calling out to her, but she couldn't quite make out what he was saying. She turned off her music and went to see what he wanted. Well, she wasn't surprised that he wanted her to turn down the jams. They introduced themselves to each other, and then got into a conversation. He was a good listener, and she enjoyed the company. A lot of people avoided her. It was something she couldn't help. "So why are you forbidden to speak the name of your school?" she asked Harry. "My uncle doesn't like what I learn there, and he doesn't want people to know where I go, because he thinks I'm a freak, and that all my friends are freaks." He eyed her attire. "I'm starting to think he may be right. About my friends, anyway." At that moment, her younger brother, Jordan, came out. "Gypsy! Aunt Narcissa's in the fire for you!" Gypsy slapped her forehead. "Jordan! How many times do I have to tell you to say phone?!" "What's a phone?" Harry was staring at them in surprise. "In the fireplace?" "Well." "Oh, don't worry, I just didn't know you were a witch. In that case, the name of my school is Hogwarts, and I'm a Gryffindor fifth year," he said, grinning. He could tell how relieved she was that she didn't have to make up some kind of story. "Thank Goddess!" "Who?" "Never mind. Anyway, my full name is Gypsy Malfoy, and I just moved here from Vermont. We came here because my dad is the new American ambassador to the Ministry of Magic." By now, Jordan was glaring at them. "Gypsy, you can talk to your new boyfriend some other time. Aunt Narcissa's waiting." "Oh, right. Hey, wanna come in and meet the 'rents?" "Um." Harry wasn't sure he understood what she had said. "English please?" She laughed. "Sorry, I have to learn to drop the slang. Do you want to come inside and meet my parents?" "Um. okay, why not." He followed her inside. 


End file.
